The big ache.

Did I tell you of my big ache? it tends to come after Ive ridden a ridiculous 21 miles without breakfast. My calves are killing me. Dont get me wrong, its good to know Im still alive and kicking, but………….and there is always a but…………I simply cant move from the recliner right now and I know I have to in order to put the cycle in the shed and lock the door. Currently, with the door open, its an invitation for a fox imigration………yes we have them in the street, underneath the shed of an artist who runs a charity shop……not that that is important in the least of course, Im just saying……….or if not a fox then the cats next door may decide it makes a good toilet. This might be a good thing as it will stop them pooping all over my garden rather than their own, if it wasnt for the fact that I keep things in my shed, and I dont want it being filled up with excrement. Nope , gonna have to go put it all away.

Also , did I tell you about the big ache? regarding the mental issues? I mean , for instance, why people in my house cant put the cutlery in the dishwasher in an orderly fashion, and in this order, knives, forks, spoons, teaspoons. Its simple. But no……apparently they are unable to do this, even though they know it messes with my mind. And how come Im the only one who can close a drawer in my house? And table settings, why are they not straight, orderly, squared off, each thing in its place….in a Zen-like fashion. Its not hard. It truly upsets me, inside, when I see things that arent equidistant or at least artfully non-equadistant. I cant stan it when I open the cutlery draw and see knives with blades facing every which way. They should all be the same way. Its obvious. It upsets the knives not knowing where to face.

You of course know of my other big ache.  The need, yes need, to be skirted now and then. Trousers make me feel ill. I get tetchy at the thought. Artist friends, both those on fb and in the real world, find nothing peculiar in it, most of them wear trousers, after all , and they are women so maybe they shouldnt in the eyes of some. Although in the eyes of my nearest and dearest that isnt so as she constantly wears trousers. But this same person is so threatened , it seems, by the idea of me skirted that she cant , or wont, see the obvious………..that it helps my mental state to be calm and that  for some reason, the freedom of a skirt brings that tranquility. It brings self confidence. It might just be what I need to get my art to a succesful setting and therefore do nothing else but make art, and therefore make me even more happy, and she would see me more often as I wouldnt be out in a cab picking up strangers. A female model Ive known a long time now , has invited me to meet up soon, over lunch, and EXPECTS me to wear a skirt. Her words were…….”and we can both be in skirts!”.

oh, and yesterday another lady on fb, having seen this image;

DSC_0938[1]

declared, ” OMG your so sexy”. Of course she may have been sarcastic, tounge firmly in cheek, but somehow , I dont think so. I like to not think so. It eases my big ache…………one of them anyhow.

Love all, hurt none, and walk in soft shoes

Isi Tart

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