the happening that didnt happen but still did. The tea party that did happen.

Well, Its been an interesting day today, as interesting days go. but first…………………

18 hours before…………….da, da, daaaa……………fade into next scene set, erm, 18 hours before.

Diane…………blah blah blah blah

Me…………….hmm, yeah, yeah, noooo, ah, yeah yeah, yeah

Diane…………blah blah blah blah

( I have to point out this script is not intending to offend my old friend Diane, its just that the conversation was so ornate and complicated so Ive condensed and stylised it……..just in case she or her family read this, which they wont because she doesnt have internet and her family dont know me)

Me…………….oh, really? gosh, thats lovely, yeah, yeah, no, no

Diane…………..blah blah blah blah

Me……………..Im going to Gay Pride parady tomorrow with my friend Amanda and…

Diane………….Oh, is that the one who…………

Me……………..Yes, thats the one, sells me herbal shampoo to regrow my hair………….and that other thing too, yes……thats the one

Diane…………..that should be fun !

Me……………..yes, but it has been mooted that I should go enfemme

Diane……………wonderful, its been a while hasnt it? you should, what do you need, what can I lend you, do you have a suitable dress, and what about makeup, come upstairs and try some things on Im sure I have something you will be fine in……..

She rises and leads me up the stair to her bedroom. In between there are many many moments where she distracts herself  (oh that bag has old photos and paper clippings in that I took to college last time I worked there, and that book should be taken back as I only borrowed it, and this needs redecorating) but eventually we get there and she starts searching through her wardrobe , choosing a couple of things.

Diane…………….undress and try this one on, Im sure it will fit.

I do as Im told and slip into this lovely blue sleeveless dress that comes down to midcalf and then produces a matching cardigan and throws in a terrific beaded necklace. We pack it all up into a carrier bag and I take it to the studio where I compare it to other things that Supergirl hides there, mostly as props for paintings………honestly………HONESTLY………….whatever, talk to the hand………….anyway, as Im doing this Im getting anxious and wondering if this is a good idea. I pack the wig , the cosmetics, the undies, and the clothing ready to pick up the next day.

(before i go any further,  I should inform you all that this is totally unknown to significant others because they would get the wrong end of the stick, so shut up if you see them, thanks. end of disclaimer)

Forward to 10 hours ago……….

I awake, look at the clock……………its…………what? oh no, its 9.30 !!! So I hurriedly get up, dress, shave hard, and jump in the car…………..where I realise its too late, if I go to the studio to get the kit I will be really rushing around to pick up the painting from Q of B, so I go straight to the city instead. Pick up painting. Drive over to Amanda’s where Liz greets me with something like, “So is this where you change into ooo woo woo?” and I have to say, no, Im sorry.

The fact is there is no time. I hate being rushed. I cant stay all day………see later in blog for reason……….its all in my history and maybe it should stay there? Im really happy now as a man in a skirt or kilt (whats the difference?) Do I really want to reprise that? So, Amanda offered me a dress, but I declined.

When we got to curve we sat and had a hot drink and watched people arriving for the parade. So many weird and wonderful outfits. A policeman with a “gay” bike! men with wings, women with sparkley things, some on roller skates, teachers union with banners………it looked like fun, and a little bit of me regretted that I hadnt been braver, but I had no time anyway. So Im now thinking that the Universe engineered this just so I could have a taster so that next year I might join in more. We did set off with the parade, near the back. I heard one voice say “I like your kilt”, but I ignored that. Then there was a man taking photographs and I said, “Im not gay, honest, Im just supporting my friend, really !!!” hahaha, we both, Amanda and myself, laughed at that. It was fine, but i had to leave when we got to the clock tower. Had to get home to buy a new curtain track as TOHOTS had broken the one in the bay window. Turned out nobody had the size we require. And I had to get back in time for a certain tea party.

Next on this channel;

The tea party

Ava loved her birthday presents ( a week late as we only get to see her once a fortnight) but the greatest of all was the playhouse in the garden. Sam had put a play kitchen in there and a stool and a carpet and xmas lights, and she loved it. Although we had snacks on the table Ava managed to eat most of hers in the playhouse! lovely.

So, to summarise;

It started with this;  Last year's Leicester Pride(picture courtesy of Leicester Mercury)

It could have been this;

IMG_20150315_150329 but became this (almost, diferent top tbf) DSC_0159[1] and was definitely this;  DSC_0221[1] and this; DSC_0220[1]  (thats me mammy……great grandma to Ava)DSC_0229[1]and this is dad and daughter doing a Gilbert and George)

so……….apologies to Amanda who I think really wanted me to support her fully by adopting the clothing , and to Diane who wanted to hear all about it cos, like lots of women, she loves it when chaps dress up like that. But I had a good time anyway, and judging by fb Amanda went on to have fun at Vicky Park (thats a good name for a character………..note to self), and my family had fun with the youngest addition to the family. That makes it a pretty good day. Thankyou Universe !!

Love all, hurt none and walk in soft shoes

Isi Tart

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