I just gave some advice to a prospective model and realised I should really take that advice and apply it to my art. Its funny how we can offer advice to people on how to live and yet live quite diferently ourselves. However, on one thing I can say I do what I say others should. Dont want to keep harping on about this, but today I was modeling in Loughborough, went in a kilt. Nobody said anything. Had a text from TOHOTS asking if I wanted to have lunch with youngest son and his pregnant lady. I said yes. It meant that for the first time he saw me in my kilt. He didnt say anything. But when it was time to leave he hurriedly left the restaurant and got into his car, and then had to wait for his grandmother, who he was taking home. Now, I dont know if that was because he was embarrassed to be with his kilted dad, or because he had things to do and needed to rush off. But it wont change me. Because Im no longer prepared to live how others think I should. And nor should anyone. Tomorrow Im taking them, at the ungodly hour of 5.30 a.m. to the airport for their day in Dublin. I wont mention it. He wont mention it, Im sure. And so we will go on living with an elephant in the room, even though he told me on Christmas day, in the pub, that he has a mate, a succesful entrepenuer, who wears a skirt everyday. Seems like maybe its cool for other people but not for those in your actual circle. This made me think of Amanda Ure, who I first knew as Mark Ure (sorry, not supposed to mention the M name, but its relevant) and yes, I find it hard sometimes , when talking to others about my genius herbalist friend (I hope) to not say he or him. This is ridiculous when on facebook it seems perfectly natural to say she or her. What is that about? Ive decided its about what other people will think of me. For instance, will they think I also want to transition sexually or genderly or what ever the word is , just because I wear kilts and other non-bifurcated shorts? I dont. So Ive resolved that in all conversations regarding Amanda I will use the female pronouns. Its the prefered “dress” of the person concerned, so who am I to say diferent? It would be like me saying Im not wearing a kilt, Im wearing a pair of tartan shorts that havent been sewn up the middle.
On the subject of my transister friend (I hope) SHE has had a major tumble over a raised paving slab and I know she wont do this, but it should be reported to the council with a demand for reparations. Its the councils responsibility to maintain the public highway and that includes pavements. Instead SHE will carry on, in pain, thinking its the Christian ( or the Heidegger) thing to do, but of course it isnt. I do hope HER black eye heals nicely but more importantly, HER ribs, which are going to give HER pain whenever she laughs. The one thing SHE must NOT do is see this as an omen, a message from that god SHE believes in. One could easily say the scarring around the eye is a message saying that pretty is not the way, that the blooded nose is a punch from that loving god of HERS and is gods way of saying DONT change this body I gave you. How shitty would that be? That would be god mimmicking human society saying to me and others, do not wear non-bifurcated shorts. It aint gonna happen. I WILL wear purple, and so will SHE !
So when I told this model how I got my first life modeling gigs, and how that lead eventually to being headhunted by a university, I realised that maybe I should listen to myself and go knocking on doors regarding promoting and selling my artwork. Sometimes, it seems, we have to talk to others in order to talk to ourselves.
Love all, hurt none, and walk in soft shoes